James 4:3

αἰτεῖτε … αἰτεῖσθε. The active and middle seem to be used indiscriminately as in the case of some other verbs, as ἀκούω and ἀκούομαι, ἰδεῖν and ἰδέσθαι, φλέγειν and φλέγεσθαι. Clyde, § 31 d. Comp. also Luke 15:6; Luke 15:9, συγκαλεῖ … συγκαλεῖται, ADE al. plu.: the cause of this being that the older form in -μαι has never been quite displaced by the newer form in -ω. This is the more to be expected in a verb of petition which necessarily implies the force of a middle, viz. that the action is done in some way for or towards oneself, or in one’s own interest. Monro, p. 8; Jelf, § 368.

αἰτεῖτε however may be preferred on account of λαμβάνετε, and the two middles αἰτεῖσθαι and αἰτεῖσθε connect the clauses in which they are used.

As Trench points out, αἰτεῖν (Lat. petere) in N.T. always retains its proper sense of begging from a superior. Thus our Lord never uses αἰτεῖν or αἰτεῖσθαι of Himself in respect of what He seeks on behalf of His disciples from God. The word employed is always ἐρωτᾶν (Lat. rogare), an asking, that is, upon equal terms. John 14:16; John 16:26; John 17:9; John 17:15; John 17:20. See Trench, N.T. Syn. sub voc.

ἐν ἡδοναῖς. Not upon but in your pleasures.