1 Thessalonians 4:4,5

Each of you men should know how to take. "To take" = KTASTHAI "which can only mean to acquire,' not to possess.'" [Alford (Greek Testament)] Paul is advising marriage, as he does in 1 Corinthians 7:2. The Gentiles went either to the extreme of celibacy or else unrestrained lust. Women were treated as "disposable," and as "necessary evils." God himself decrees marriage is holy (Genesis 2:18; Hebrews 13:4; see notes on Matthew 19:4-5). No Jewish High Priest would have believed marriage to be an unholy thing! [Paul speaks to men, but this would apply to women also.] Not with a lustful desire. "Lust" is obsessive desire outside the marriage relationship. Lust makes a poor standard to choose a prospective mate. God intended a man and woman to join for life in marriage. This is a holy bond, in which they fulfill each other's needs. Paul makes this plain in 1 Corinthians 7:3-5; and points out that celibacy is a special "gift" 1 Corinthians 7:7.